I really should be asleep right now. it's 2 AM, and I have to tests tomorrow/today. Yet I can't stop thinking. I needed someone this past summer, and they weren't there. now that person is coming here, and i'm an odd mix of happy, and sad all at the same time. Believe it or not this summer I wanted to become an atheist. I know it doesn't sound like me, because i'm a proud Muslim, and everyone knows that. I believe in everything in Islam, but my best friend, or ex best friend told me something about it, and it was one of those misunderstood versus, and for a moment my faith shattered. I guess it wasn't as strong as I though because a single thing pulled it all apart. I didn't know what to do, as usual, and as usual there was no one there to help me through it. It was the start of a terrible summer, and honestly I don't know how I got over it.
Sometimes I wish I could drink and drain my sorrows away with a bottle of vodka. But I know that won't help, it'll waste my time, and i'll be an idiot for a while. I'll wake up with a headache worse than the one I usually wake up with, and it will simply cause me problems. I just wish there was a way to be myself I guess, just let everything go, and be me, but then again I don't know ME.
Sometimes I wish I could drink and drain my sorrows away with a bottle of vodka. But I know that won't help, it'll waste my time, and i'll be an idiot for a while. I'll wake up with a headache worse than the one I usually wake up with, and it will simply cause me problems. I just wish there was a way to be myself I guess, just let everything go, and be me, but then again I don't know ME.
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